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Beliefs and attitudes towards male domestic violence in South Kivu

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par Ndabuli Theophile Mugisho
University of KwaZulu Natal - Master 2011
  

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4.5.3 Dowry entitlement and domestic violence

Participants to the interviews revealed that dowry entitlement is one of the factors that involve South Kivu men in domestic abuse. Below are displayed the views of Comanda and Dira, respectively:

Since I gave my cows, this means that I married her and it is not her who married me. So I am right to correct her because I paid the dowry; she depends on me and she can't decide in my home as she likes.

Comanda has said everything. The dowry I pay is what gives me power over my wife.It is like the woman's family sold me their daughter. Yes, I buy her because I paid something.

Discussion

Dowry gives man power over the women he married because Dira says ` I gave my cows...I am right to correct her'. In the literature review, the DRC Ministry of Gender and Family (2006) states that there is the tradition of bride price among the different tribes of the country and they give it different names. In South Kivu for instance, the Shi tribe calls it Ngulo. Literally, this means cost or price (of the woman) that a man pays to the woman's family in order to have her in legal marriage. However, in this region, there are a lot of men who have wives for whom they have never given any dowry. For the latter case, the tradition stipulates that when a man dies before he has paid the dowry; his children are obliged to pay for it to their mothers' family (Mirindi, 2003:70). Bride cost makes South Kivu men believe women have no right as it entitles women to being considered as properties of their husbands, which makes some men abuse them. The fact that men pay the dowry means that they are entitled to have power to make decisions in the home and anyone who may oppose this must suffer the consequences.

In this context, every man does his best to pay the dowry for his wife because he knows that this shows his power. It is the boy's family that pays it for him to the bride's family. We find this remark by Mirindi (2003:53) as he notes that `in South Kivu, it is the man who pays the dowry, in animals, materials or in cash, which makes the woman become always dependent on the man'. When Comanda says he paid something, this means that by giving the dowry price, the husband has purchased the wife. Actually, this gives the wife little or no value towards the husband. It builds arrogance and violence in the man's mind and so it makes the wife to become the prime victim of his violence. The practice of the bride-price has become an acute issue in the DRC and in South Kivu in particular because the average bride cost has risen (Linda, 2009). Such changes have made the dowry have an ugly face that is generating negative effects for women including their own survival. Hatari (1999:81) reveals that data from South Kivu province directly link bride cost to domestic violence. He adds that some husbands have assaulted their wives calling them daughters of a `dog' and others have sent their children to their grandparents to feed them, just because they gave them many cows for bride price.

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